The joys of orthodontia

Last month, Andrew was overjoyed to finally have his braces removed. Although he'd only had them for sixteen months, the orthodontist had originally told him his treatment would only last for nine months, so Drew was feeling quite overdue. He grinned like a maniac for a whole week once the brackets were removed.

Last week, three weeks after the removal, I took him back to the ortho office to get his retainer. I expected the old-school plastic-and-metal-wire contraption, but he returned instead with a clear plastic guard that slips over his teeth. The instructions were to wear it for 24 hours for a few weeks, then just at night. Andrew was happy that his retainer was "invisible," but the thought crossed my mind that maybe they should dye the inside neon green just so he could find it easily when it was out. Oh well, not much I can do about that... He got a sparkly blue case to keep it in, and off we went.

Fast forward to this week. He'd only had the retainer for all of four days when my mother-in-law called to ask if she could take the boys out shopping. I said yes, and Drew and Jace went off for the afternoon with Grandma. They went to Target, bought a few things, got me a Mother's Day present (!), and ate dinner at the Target Cafe. Drew had pizza.

He took out his retainer.

He set it on a napkin inside the pizza box. Can you guess what happened next?

I found him a pair of rubber gloves, and after a quick phone call to Grandma to find out which Target they'd visited, off we went so that he could rummage through garbage cans. Most of the trash wasn't too bad, napkins and pizza boxes and such, but there were plenty of things there that caused me to lose my appetite for the night and then some. I don't think I will ever be able to eat nachos again.

He did eventually find it, and after a quick scrubbing with toothpaste, it's as good as new. Thankfully, we've only got another two weeks or so until he's down to wearing it just as night.

But something tells me that while this may be my first foray into Dumpster Diving for Retainers, it won't be my last.